Blabberings.

Badly Missing You

by Ren Concha

As I open my eyes from sleep,

I saw no you that made me weep.

Those days that we both spend together,

is long gone just fast as a feather.

Now my heart aches so badly.

As I feel so broken and lonely.

I hate it, today and tomorrow.

As I continue to feel this sorrow.

And at this very second I’m crying and it's all because I love you too much.

I am so weak and vulnerable that I want and absolutely need to feel your touch,

to the point that I’m so helpless that I can't restrain myself from missing you.

And this drives me insane that I want to spend every single day of my life with you.

I miss you!

Malapit na ako magtapos ng highschool. Magcocollege na ako next school year. Ang bilis ng panahon. Mag-gagraduate na ako after 3 months time.

Kararaan ko lang sa napakadaming bagyo at pagsubok. Isa na ruon ang pagkuha ng UPCAT. Madali lang kung tutuusin. Kulang lang talaga sa oras. Kaya naprepressure at hindi nakakasagot ng matino. Ang ginawa ko nalang eh magshade ng kahit anong circle tas pinasa ko na.

Bukas naman, USTET kukunin ko. Wala akong napag-aralan. Kasalanan ko rin naman kung hindi ako makapasa diba? Pero hindi ko talaga kasi alam kung anu ang pag-aaralan. Wala akong ideya. Kaya hihintayin ko nalang ang bukas na dumating at magdadasal nalang ako sa Diyos na sana makapasa ako. 

At hayy naku, isa pa tong mga magulang. Iniisip ang kanilang kahihiyan kapag hindi ako nakapasa. Kasalanan ko parin ba yon? Kung yun ang kaya ko, bakit hindi nila tanggapin. Nag-eexpect na naman sila. At eto naman ako nababagabag sa mangyayari. Ayoko sila ma-disappoint pero higit sa lahat ayaw ko namang ma-disappoint sarili ko. First section ako, hindi sa pagmamayabang. Pero nakarating ako dun dahil mahilig ako mag-recite at ma-vocal ako. Pagdating sa written, loser ako. Kaya kinakabahan ako. Ano na lamang gagawin ko? 

Hayy. Sana lang talaga makapasa ako dito. Dahil yung UPCAT at USTET lang kinuhanan ko ng exam. Kung hindi pa ako makapasa, san na lang ako pupulutin. Hayy, Hakuna Matata nalang.

I've been a maiden in-love for months.

And just a while ago have I turned to a fallen angel.

I liked him so much and I thought I had the chance.

But it's all false, he's damn gay, what a great epic fail.

Sadness lingers in my heart, disturbance is created within my soul.

I'm shattered, I never knew I was such a turtle, so slow.

He was so sweet to me that I thought I was playing the girlfriend role.

And now I know, I was such a feeler, carried away with the flow.

Now at house, I stomp over things, screaming "He's gay! He's gay!"

I don't know what to do, I can't understand why and how,

He's so damn masculine and attractive that he would always make my day,

but now it's no more, it's over, and again it ended, another failed vow.

-Ren

Player
by Ren Concha

I hate liars, users, posers, betrayers,

but  I mostly hate damn players.

They play with you and all,

makin you fall for nothing at all.

You got to test that person first,

before his real intentions burst.

when at last the time comes I have proven it

I realized I was just stupid as it is and so damn it

Out of this throbbing ache knowing I was completely treated as a fool,

I furiously came out of my silent shell with burning rage losing my cool.

Yet I am an educated woman, so I painstakingly freed that boy from prison,

and so in the end even though I know he deserves it, to God I left the decision.

I guess it's too much to expect to have a serious relationship.

It's like holding on to a slippery pole to survive in a sinking ship.

I hope the next time I fall in love even if it's merely an infatuation,

I won't experience any agony nor pain for a change in situation.

Moi Description
by Ren Concha

I regard my hobbies as my very own passion.

That's why people told me I have a weird obsession.

But I don't care, I'm happy and it's because of various reasons.

They are my true friends, their presence shines in all seasons.

I play drums and never get tired of it each session.

I love cute stuffs, anime, manga, in short I am an otaku in action.

I dream of being a president, I am afraid of no cautions.

I am a creature of grandeur, I won't be someone of foolish treasons.

Before I was such a little bitchy girl with fair complexion.

Now I am a big matured girl who changed because of devotion.

Looking back in the past of my life which I colored with crayons,

It transformed with rainbow colors and is now full of stars of zillions.

With those little things in life I set my eyes with admiration,

I never thought of those as my secret obligation.

This passion was made out of my pure and untainted dedication.

And thus set my humble declaration.

It was my lone intention not to be someone of the world's pollution.

That's why I have made no violation of rules, no need for negotation.

I am the one and only product of the universal collision.

I seek of the one and only truth of reality's illusion.

You are different from the other girls I've met,

In my whole life, you were the first to touch my soul.

Things have gotten good, bad, better and worst,

Yet you never showed weakness neither pain nor hesitance.

I am enlightened, to think that someone like you still exists.

In this world, I couldn't find anyone better and best than you.

You are my red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet.

You completed the colors missing in my lone white and black world.

It may seem cheesy, but I wonder how can I say this to you.

I never did confess in my whole life, and later, I am about to.

I am afraid you reject me, I am afraid you don't even like me.

That's why I'll wait no matter how long, for this infatuation to bloom into love.

So, sorry if I was harsh in any way, but I need to be tough.

Cause a man like me is shyly, madly and truly in love with a woman like you.

So, even if I crash the places you are hiding from,

And steal you from your silent and frightened shell,

Don't be afraid, I won't make you cry, I won't harm you, I won't bite, because I respect you.

I love you <3 p="">

Build a New World

by Ren Concha

Too much hardships and difficulties may cause us pain.

But it is never the reason to stop searching for what it meant.

We must keep on standing, fighting, again and again.

Because time is precious, we must cherish each moment.

Everyone knows how painful is it to start anew.

But to succeed, to feel happiness, let's rebuild a new future.

Let's not waste our time being blue.

Hope and faith will keep us moving for sure.

Each coming day is a new beginning.

Believe, don't stop believing, it comes with magic.

Fly and flee upon the sky, go on soaring.

Let's go on with the flow and follow the beat of the music.

Treat today like it's a ride on your favorite rollercoaster. It's thrilling! It's exciting! It's kind of scary! The closer you get to the top, the scarier it is! You may or may not be aware of the sounds of seagulls, cotton candy vendors and the ocean. You may or may not feel your stomach about to hit the top of your mouth. You may or may not scream. One thing is for sure though: Once you've climbed to the top, there is nothing you can do to stop the ride. Whee!

You're the Apple Of My Eye,

Mango Of My Pie,

Palaman of my Tinapay,

Keso of my monay,

Teeth of my suklay,

Finger of my kamay,

Tagasunog of my kilay.

Blood in my atay,

Bubbles of my laway,

Sala of my bahay,

Seeds of my palay,

Clothes in my ukay-ukay,

Calcium in my kalansay,

Calamansi of my siomai,

Vitamins in my gulay,

Tungkod when I'm pilay,

Feeling when I'm high,

Shoulders when I cry,

Cure to my aray!

In short, you're my friend habambuhay! XD

LOVELOTS, you ALL~!

Acknowledge Life

by Ren Concha

Life goes down, life goes up

There's no such thing as crap

We need to accept things as they are

Unless we do want a bloody war

We got so many choices to believe in

but we got such tiny faith to use from within

We walk many paths, we cross many bridges

But some gave up and wasted many chances

Let's get our spirits high cause we must stand up and fight.

Let's gather all the courage and go on through many lengths.

Cause life doesn't end that simply, we must collaborate and unite.

There's so much more in this world left to see with our own strengths.

Walk like a princess, gallantly but don't trip, it's a shame.

Flee through the sky, escape but don't evade, it's a knowledge.

Run as if you've just been freed from a cage, don't think it's lame.

Pause and stop, as if all freezes, then search for the message.

I look like a girl with matching long hair and stuffs. Just no make-up.

But either way, no one particularly cares. After all, I'm just a big fat loser.

I act like a boy, and people got used too it.

I got pretty used to it too. But things are going too far.

Boys think as if that it's okay to hurt me (physically) cause I'm strong, cause I'm not like those usual girls.

And damn it hurts me. When they actually punched their hungry fists to my shoulders, it actually hurts.

I don't feel the pain physically but I was emotionally dumbfounded.

I just felt like I want to cry but I thought it was ridiculous.

Ughh. For once in my lifetime, I want to be treated as a girl, as a woman, I want to feel it. And it sucks since it's impossible with me now.

~~

Treat Me Like A Woman
by Ren Concha

Treat me as a woman, like a girl you've always known.

Treat me as a girl, who have been wanting to wear a gown.

Don't look up upon my strength, cause I'm truly weak.

So why don't you try to know me first before you speak.

Treat me as a woman, like a usual girl who has mixed emotions.

Treat me as a girl, who wants to be protected from cautions.

Don't just punch me and think it's okay; Be more mindful.

And most of all choose your words to say; Be more careful.

Life is a little short, make me feel loved.

Life is pretty unfair, but don't be unreasonable, don't ever run.

Life is a little scary, make me feel secured.

Life is pretty chaotic, but don't forget, I'm still a woman.